Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura
Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura are comedians who are also married. They are the Mommies and they welcome you to join them. Dental updates! Dudes! Stories! Wiping!

Uh-oh, better check all your previous tweets, thoughts, voice recordings and more! They're coming for you and want that apology. You giving in? Kevin Hart said, "No, thank you" to the Academy and comedians around the world are forever grateful. 

Plus we have the good stuff. An amazing YMH EXCLUSIVE! It turns out that Julia kept an extra video from Joe and she's held on to it all this time until now. We have that video! Get that vomit bag ready for another winner from Joe. 

Comedian/actor Adam "The Voice" Ray joins us in studio and he is a natural fit. Check out his podcast About Last Night that he does with another YMH alum, Brad Williams. 

We also have some video special affects that you'll have to check out the Youtube page to truly appreciate. 

Direct download: YMH_ADAM_RAY_478.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

Oh. My. Jeans. This episode has it all: Farts, Serial Killers (not Tommy) explained in detail by Josh Potter, JULIA with the full story of how she received those AWFUL video messages!

AND the great and hilarious KYLE DUNNIGAN joins us in studio to discuss his amazing instagram videos, his chaotic dating life, a faster path to SMASHING and how much $ it would take to spend the night with a lady nobody finds attractive. 

 

Direct download: YMH_KYLE.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

Darts? Farts? Why not both? Such a special thing to bring two beautiful things together. 

We have some really fun guessing games for you today in our Drugs or Mental Illness segment AND this Horrible or Hilarious is sure to make you HOWL!

The "Julia" submissions keep making us laugh and you give us some great advice on Tom's scrum problem (Christina's mouth problem). 

AND the great Fahim Anwar sits with us to discuss his new sketch special GOAT FACE, which can be seen on Comedy Central as this audio drops!

Go get it!

Direct download: YMH_FAHIM.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:00pm EST

Jeans are back up and on and thankfully no more fire in our hood. 

We are BLESSED this episode to be joined by comedian and podcaster, Ryan Sickler! His new album, GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF is out now and currently #1 on iTunes. It's definitely worth your time - go ahead and check that one out, playa!

AND, Sean Anders the writer-director of INSTANT FAMILY stops by for a long conversation. It's real and neat and raw. 

This is one of our faves in a long time, JULIA. Mmwaahh!

Direct download: YMH_475_.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

Fire! It's everywhere out here. This week is not your usual recording. We are alone, without guests and honestly more than a little freaked out by these outrageous firestorms. 

We wanted to try and get a quick episode in before we evacuate. We were able to have some laughs and just be super silly which was probably more for us than ever before. 

These fires are freaky and deadly and we're just happy we had a moment to get our family together before taking off. 

Thanks for all you thoughts, Jean. 

Direct download: YMH_474.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

A dream come true. Tom Green, one of the funniest and most original voices of the last 25 years comes over and chops it up with the Mommy's. 

We discuss his incredible rise to fame, his dedication to his pranks, how his life changed and what he's up to today. 

PLUS, more ridiculous clips that you send in and a whole lot more. 

 

Direct download: YMH_TOM_GREEN.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

Christina's new special The Degenerates is out on Netflix! Check it out, Jean. 

 

Plus this episode is full of ladies! Ladies who shut it down, ladies who yell and scream, ladies with amazing email questions and two remarkable lady guests. 

First, the great Whitney Cummings is a great, hilarious hang. We get into it with her in all the best ways. 

AND Kate Chastain from Bravo TV's hit show, Below Deck joins us to discuss all things Yachty. Get ready to fantasize with us.

Direct download: YMH_WHITNEY_KATE.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

The internet giveth and we taketh with pride! We have a solo act that we think you're all really going to like in a drug hazed, terrifying kind of way. 

Tommy can find comfort in an Aussie mate who also has what appears to be a most disloyal wife!

Plus what makes you feel better than really cheap people who express how cheap they are on a reality show. Listen and you'll see what we mean. 

And the very funny and open Annie Lederman joins us in studio. She shares incredible and sometimes enraging stories about her upbringing and she's hilarious.

Almost forgot we found a gem of a Rosie O'Donnell movie that we can't wait to watch. We have a sneak peek!

Direct download: YMH_ANNIE.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 1:45am EST

Comedy isn't supposed to be sexy. Try telling that to this weeks guest. Chad Daniels isn't just one of the best comedians on the planet, he's extremely handsome and a master of Road Beave. Just ask the women of Asia, where Chad smashed for a week straight a few years back when he was filming I Need You To Kill, the documentary he appeared in with Tom and Pete Lee. 

This week we feature more deeply troubled people. Are they high? Not sure. Are they mentally stable? Doesn't appear so. Plus you the listener writes in about bum kisses, ball tugs, grandma's too old for the toilet and so much more. 

More psycho test questions too - wish Jada Pinkett would take it!

Direct download: YHM_CHAD_DANIELS.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:16pm EST

Pull up those jeans and tighten your belt, this one is epic. 

We bring you our first unofficial round of On Drugs or Mentally Ill? This one comes from Starbucks and this lady really loses it. We couldn't feel more connected to the barista that (apparently) told her to get off her phone. This is a rare feat for us since normally Tommy is plotting barista harm. Don't worry, later we find a customer who is Tommy's soul mate - for all the wrong reasons. 

PLUS, the great Josh Potter joins us in studio to share some of the strangest and most offensive adult entertainment he could find and it's as hilarious as it is disturbing.

AND we have Felipe Esparza join us for a quality talk about comedy, life, drugs and a lot more. He's so hilarious and we already want him back. 

Check him, fools.

Direct download: YMH_469_FELIPE.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

Burps? Yup. Face farts? Uh-huh. Jizz into a cup and then sip your own? You know where you are. 

It's another episode of the award-winning, life-altering, always enlightening YMH. 

More evidence that not only is Christine a snitch, she's a hypocrite too!

Plus SNL alum Finesse Mitchell stops by to talk some ish and promote his new special, The Spirit Told Me To Tell You, coming to Showtime October 19.

Direct download: 468_FINESSE.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

Pull your jeans up over your head. This one is a smasher. It's one thing to pretend to be disabled. It's another to do it so effectively that three separate caretakers change your diaper and wash your beans. Should we condemn or celebrate this disturbed man?

Are Bert and Ernie gay? Uh, yeahhhh.

Plus we finally solve the FGTRTD mystery, we read your emails and above all else we are beyond thrilled to have Ethan and Hila Klein of H3 Podcast in studio with us. 

They are delightful, hilarious and sweet to no end. Learn how these two Ted's fell in love, rose to fame on YouTube and more. 

Try it out!

Direct download: YMH467_H3H3.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 1:53am EST

We have found him! A guy who doesn't understand what face-farting is, so he needs a demo. OH, NOW HE GETS IT!

So many of you wrote in to express your disgust with Christina's lack of loyalty. A few of you agree with her, but there's snitches in every circle. 

Plus, could Tommy's parents have been any more weird about sex? No.

An actual medical doctor listens to our show and he gives us the undisputed truth about air escaping via vag and butt.

AND Andrew Santino, a fantastic comedian and actor joins us and we can say without question he is a hall of fame guest. 

Pull your jeans up, but don't touch your peepee. 

Direct download: YMH_466_SANTINO.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

Jada Pinkett Smith's body is just like Antartica and Iraq and Cleveland - it's really something!

Is Christina loyal? Seems like she might be the type to turn Tommy in just for a simple murder charge.

The great and hilarious Doug Mellard joins us in studio. His new album, Fart Safari 2: Fart Harder is not only the greatest title ever, it's also hilarious. 

We discuss Doug's awful tattoos, the first time Tom met him (after being attacked), emails from listeners and much more.

Pull em up!

Direct download: 465_Doug_Mellard.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

A lot of ladies out there want to eat the booty, what about you? 

Charles Schwab's daughter Brenda transitioned into a massive man, Brendan Schaub. We speak to him about his amazing life (and how much he looks like a man now). 

Plus we ALL laugh at a man who was electrocuted on live TV. Does he live? You'll have to listen to find out. 

The FGTRTD saga continues, we read your emails, play an AMAZING new prank call featuring Top Dog AND does President Obama listen to YMH?!?!

Direct download: YMH_464_Brendan.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

The jeans are back and ready to pull them up!

There's nothing like a fart prank on a dad. Dad's definitely have the best, angry reactions. 

PLUS, the gay porn writer/actor/directors that brought us the "my daddy taught me" classic lines are back with another and it's even better!

Speaking of farts, famed fired security guard, Paul Flart joins us for a quick chat AND Tina gets super uncomfortable with the "I'll make ya cum guy" and his new message. 

Your mothers also discuss Louis CK's "comeback," a horrific public phone call a grandmother took, sucking feet in public and more!

Direct download: YMH_463.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 12:34am EST

Beep! Beep! Beep! No, there isn't a dump truck backing down the street, Bert Kreischer AKA Burnt Chrysler is back and his body makes that same noise whenever he takes a step. 

We are celebrating this enormous man's great, new hilarious Netflix special SECRET TIME which is available worldwide AUGUST 24. 

We discuss it all with Bert and have some laughs that are too good to describe. This one is an instant denim classic.

 

Special thanks to Tony Celano and Eric Freedman for the amazing animation and Jake Glazier for the perfect voice overs. 

Direct download: YMH_462_BERT.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

Nothing quite like a real dad losing his mind over a mediocre joke. You should know if you listen to this show that Tommy was raised by a hardcore dad boner who can barely finish a sentence if he's struck by his own "hilarious" thought. We may have found some competition for Top Dog this week.

PLUS, if you are a lady or a ZER do you want a man/zim to treat you like the perfect little princess that you are? Gross. And why do all those girls talk like that, Britttany?!?

We are joined in studio by the great Brad Williams a hilarious comic and friend of ours. We break down some hooker sales pitches, guess what FGT RTD means, read your emails and hear Brad's great stories about the lamest stuff he hears from people about being a little person. 

This one is a certified denim classic!

Direct download: Brad_williams_YMH_461.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

Done with white people? This guy is too. Not the brightest guy, but he's white so what can you expect?

Plus grief is real. The best way to process it is to dance and record it and share it with the world. Please share your grief dances with us!

Loud cell phone talkers - please stop or get shot (something we're working on). 

The great Matt Braunger returns to the show with a lot of hilarious insight. Check out Matt's new podcast, Advice From a Dip S**t with Matt Braunger.

 

Direct download: 460_Braunger.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

This episode was delayed due to Tom's demanding movie star lifestyle, but don't worry, it's HOME HERE NOW. 

Christina had a THEYBY. She and Tom go over the huge upside of raising their child in a gender neutral world. 

There's also a new cool guy who is just putting out to the world that he would like some sex and he chooses the most unflattering of camera angles to rope you in. 

AND Charo and Top Dog are on the show discussing everything from M**ijuana to Charo's amazing farts and so much more.

PLUS, your emails cover ANNOUNCING you have a big dong before you should it to a lover and whether or not your mommies fight before or during the show. 

Direct download: YMH_459.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 6:20pm EST

This is one really loaded. Upon playback, it hit us. Could this episode be TOO good? Yes, but you deserve it just for hanging with us. 

This week we discuss a rapper who likes women who are almost not women - could he like men? Sure seems like it. 

We get on the phone with Daddy Long Neck who tells us the full story of his neck, his voice and a potential fight with Crazy Locs (probably not a good idea). 

Charo and Tom join us on a call to discuss the new Sicario movie among other things. 

THEN due to CP's pregnancy and the recording schedule we had to keep things going, we have a DENTAL UPDATE with Charo and Tom IN STUDIO. 

As if that isn't enough, the great and hilarious Nikki Glaser joins us in studio to discuss her blossoming radio career - she hosts You Up? on Sirius, she continues to travel the country performing stand up and she recently taped the CC Roast of Bruce Willis, where she no doubt burned him badly. 

 

Please support our sponsors: 

ShadyRays.com code: MOM

Stamps.com code: MOM

23andMe.com/mom

DollarShaveClub.com/mom

Quip.com/mom

Direct download: YMH_458_NIKKI.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

The Jeans are probably cuddling a new baby (non-gender specific) as you listen to this. Please know that God watches you when you watch porn and you'll probably have to answer to him. 

Also, do you think we should get fart mics for the studio we might be moving to? 

Pull up your jeans and listen what will be an all time classic. 

Direct download: YMH_457.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

The great Ari Shaffir AKA Airy Shaeffer returns to the motherland. It's always a treat when the most uncompromising podcaster and comic on earth decides to stop in. As usual, Ari doesn't hold back on anything. He's even transitioning (into a European comic). 

This one is full of laughs and HO-LEE S**T moments.

 

Please support our sponsors: 

NewYorker.com/mom

SquareSpace.com/mom

 

Direct download: 456_ARI_YMH.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 12:28am EST

The great Kevin Nealon is in studio with absolutely amazing stories about his rise in the comedy world. 

From his days working the bar at The Improv to Carson and SNL, you will not want this one to end. 

Kevin is a natural fit with your mothers. Pull your jeans up for a real treat, meow. 

 

Direct download: YMH_Kevin_Nealon_455.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST

It's a double date! Moshe and Natasha join us to discuss the Honeymoon Stand Up Special on Netflix and the mind-blowing reality of their fart situation. 

Plus, we learn a lot about Jews and how loud screams from people in pain are indeed FUNNY. 

 

please support our sponsors

 

Stamps.com code word: MOM

There's no reason not to join! Get yours at DollarShaveClub.com/MOM

Direct download: YMH_MOSHE_NATASHA.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 11:30pm EST